Loving Our Way Out of Narcissism

Narcissism and excessive interest in oneself is one of the biggest problems threatening humanity at this time. We could also call it malignant egotism or as author Paul Levy calls it, “malignant egophrenia,” from his book Dispelling Wetiko: Breaking the Curse of Evil. Narcissism possesses most aspects of our economy, our political system, our work, our families, and even intimate relationships. The world is suffering under an all “me, me, me” attitude with little to no “we” or “us” thinking. Our species has been overtaken by a force which only thinks about itself and consumes with no regard for all life on earth. I asked myself, “Is there something dreadfully wrong with human beings? And, what is the root cause of all this selfishness?” The answer lies in loving the ego and accepting what is. 

It makes sense in a way that everyone has the tendency to take things personally and get lost in self-absorption. Some self-focus is inevitable in that we live life from the perspective of the self. We literally don’t see through other people’s or animals’ eyes. We can only see through our own eyes. Some of us are able to more successfully practice empathy, the ability to share and feel the feelings of another, and get out of ego entrenchment of self importance. Others struggle to put themselves in the shoes of another and practice empathy. 

Trapped in Ego

We could say anyone who has not awakened fully to themselves is, in some ways, trapped in egotism. Basically, most humans on this planet are stuck in some form of ego identity which is consuming them. Let’s move away from viewing ego identity as abnormal and pathologizing this current condition. We can more easily change our current state when we simply accept it as it is. For example, if we accept that we are literally living in the state or country we are living in, then it becomes simple to move to another. Similarly, when we accept the psychological state we are in, then it becomes much easier to move to another state of being. 

Let’s wake up to who we really are as fast as we possibly can. The best way to do this is to remove any guilt about self-absorption. We all have this guilt because we are all somewhat self-absorbed. It’s really no big deal. Don’t take this having an ego thing so damn personally. (That last sentence is a bit of a joke because the ego takes everything personally… that’s how it traps us.)  Let’s just not mind it so much when we do take it personally. Let’s center our life in the service of all beings. When we get off center, we can simply return to our heart, open to the love, and get back on the horse of our deeper being and ride on to our deeper destiny. 

Take the Ego Universally

Once we stop taking personally the phenomenon of taking things personally, we can accept ego universally as a representation of where humanity is right now. What if most or all of the human beings on the planet could wake up to who we really are together? Imagine a world where we end oppression and suffering for humanity. This would be a truly, never-before-experienced Great Awakening, which would eclipse any other movement in human consciousness.. 

End Narcissism by Loving the Ego 

The act of loving, instead of denying, our ego sets in motion a force that changes or ends narcissism in its tracks. When we embrace our ego with love, there’s no power compelling us to ego identify. The ego perpetuates its separateness by continuing the story that it will always be disconnected. We end this separation by knitting the ego together with the being, through love in the moment. This must be a continual process and not simply a one-time event. By continuing to embrace and accept the ego in all its separateness, we become the one whole being that we truly are. We become interconnected with all that is.

I know that in many ways I’m simplifying the complex topic of narcissism. I understand that pathological diagnosable narcissism is not going to quickly and easily fix itself in another person. I believe that even the most ingrained form of narcissism can be treated if the person is willing to open their hearts and be vulnerable. However, this article is focused on the ego absorption tendencies that we all have toward narcissistic behavior. 

Simply Accepting Where Humanity Is

Instead of viewing this malignant ego identification as a problem, we have to accept that this is simply where humanity is as a species. Once we fully accept this tendency in ourselves as a species, we will no longer be identified with it. It’s time to end this selfish game and play a game that works for the good of all. Let’s join together to start a revolution in the heart of each individual and all of humanity so love truly prevails on planet earth and we can finally all feel honored to be a part of the human race. 

Join the Revolution

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